How to Stop Saying “Um” and Speak with Power – No More Filler Words!
You’re in the middle of making a point. It’s brilliant. It’s insightful. And then—um—it happens. That little verbal speed bump. The crutch that sneaks into your sentences and chips away at your credibility.
Filler words. You know them. "Uh." "Like." "You know." "I mean." They are the moths eating holes in your speech. And, sure, they make you sound human. But do you really want to sound human when you could sound like someone worth listening to?
Let’s fix this.
Why Do You Use Filler Words?
Because your brain is playing catch-up with your mouth. Because silence terrifies you. Because, somewhere along the way, you got the idea that if you’re not filling every second with sound, people will assume you don’t know what you’re talking about.
They won’t.
In fact, pausing—actually owning the silence—does the opposite. It makes you seem in control. It gives weight to your words. It makes people lean in.
Case in point: Barack Obama. The man is a master of the pause. Listen to one of his speeches. He doesn’t rush. He lets his words land. He pauses between thoughts, forcing you to hang on his every sentence. That’s what confidence sounds like.
Now contrast that with a nervous first-time speaker. "Uh, so, like, what I was saying is, um, you know, the thing about…"
Lost already? Exactly.
Filler words don’t just make you sound uncertain. They actively undermine your credibility. When every sentence is peppered with hesitation, the audience starts wondering: Does this person really know what they’re talking about?
The good news? You can train yourself out of this habit. And it’s easier than you think.
The "Think, Breathe, Speak" Formula
Jessica Cooper, a professional singer and voice coach, has worked with everyone from Broadway performers to nervous best men giving wedding toasts. She says the key to eliminating filler words is to slow down and trust yourself.
She teaches the Think, Breathe, Speak method. Three simple steps that will change how you communicate forever:
Think – Before you open your mouth, know what you’re going to say. Silence is fine. A half-baked sentence full of "uhs" is not.
Breathe – Before you speak, inhale. A controlled, steady breath keeps you from panicking and filling space with noise.
Speak – Now deliver your thought. Intentionally. Without verbal clutter.
Sounds simple, right? It is. But it takes practice.
Most speakers don’t realize how often they rely on filler words until they start paying attention. The next time you have a conversation, listen to yourself. How many times do you insert an unnecessary "um" or "like"?
The first step to solving the problem is awareness.
Practical Ways to Kill Fillers for Good
1. Record Yourself
You don’t know how bad it is until you hear it. So record yourself speaking. A presentation. A story. Anything. Play it back. Count the fillers. Then do it again.
2. Embrace the Pause
Pauses are power. A well-placed silence can do more than words ever could. The next time you feel an "um" coming, shut up instead. Wait. Let the silence stretch just a second longer than feels comfortable. You’ll be amazed at how much more polished you sound.
3. Get Ruthless in Rehearsal
You can’t edit yourself live, but you can train yourself in practice. Write out what you want to say. Read it aloud. Every time you catch yourself slipping in a filler, stop and start again. Do it enough times, and your brain will rewire itself to cut the fluff.
4. Use Hand Gestures (Seriously)
Research shows that moving your hands while speaking actually reduces filler words. It keeps your brain engaged, giving you something to do other than panic and fill silence. Watch a TED Talk. The best speakers move. Their words and gestures work together. Do that.
5. Know Your Crutch Words
Everyone has a signature filler. Maybe you say "like" too much. Maybe you end every sentence with "right?" Identify your verbal tics. Then make it your mission to exterminate them.
6. Practice with a Friend
Have someone listen to you speak. Tell them to call out every time you use a filler word. It’s annoying, but it works. The real-time correction forces you to become hyper-aware of your speaking patterns.
7. Speak in Shorter Sentences
Filler words often creep in when you’re trying to stretch a thought. Cut down on the verbal bloat. Get to the point. Less fluff, more impact.
What Happens When You Stop Using Fillers?
You become instantly more authoritative. You sound like you actually believe what you’re saying. People take you seriously. They listen. They remember you.
Think about your favorite speakers. They’re not rambling. They’re not stumbling. They’re composed. Clear. Precise. That’s the goal.
You gain more control over how others perceive you. Instead of sounding hesitant, you sound confident. Instead of losing your audience, you keep them engaged.
And most importantly? You stop distracting from your own message. Your words carry weight. Your silence commands attention.
So. Do you want to be the person who gets halfway through a sentence before drowning in "um, uh, you know"? Or do you want to be the speaker who commands attention and owns the room?
Your choice.
If you’re ready to clean up your speech and eliminate filler words once and for all, I can help. Email hello@speakfearless.co.uk and let’s get to work.
